Delta

Delta. A Greek symbol that has several different meanings. For everyone that passed kindergarten, it is a triangle (depends on how you draw it, it is an equilateral triangle. But then again, you could be sloppy and make it an isosceles.) In geographical terms, it represents a piece of land that splits a river in two. In aeronautics, Delta represents the airline that charges extra money to be more comfortable in their already uncomfortable planes. However, in Chemistry, it has a special significance: it represents change. It can also represent entropy, but we are SO not getting into that right now.

The drag queen screams her head off as she screams "Happy New Year" in the club. The ballons fall down, the champagne glasses tilt up, everyone's already drunken stupor becomes more distant from their sobriety, couple's lips connect to welcome the new year with a kiss. In the middle of all of that stands Pablo, watching it all with a smile.

I chose to be alone. Sure, I was invited to several parties, but I did not want to go. Yes, it may seem sad that I would want to experience the dawn of a new year by myself; but to be honest, I wanted to bring in the new year in celebration of making it through the three hundred and sixty five days of extreme tribulation.

As soon as the black and white ballons fell down, the frown I had inside me lifted up. A new year. A chance to start over. For the past two years, I brought in the New Year with Jeff, bringing our problems into the New Year like a baby with a loaded diaper. I needed to change. I needed to get out of living a dream that will never happen and start to live my own dream: getting a career and starting over.

My New Years Resolution: To not put up with people's bullshit. 2. To be more honest with people. 3. To stop living in fantasy and live my dream.

I don't look back on that year with regret. To be honest, I am glad I experienced it. I am not going to look back on the bad times that I faced; I am going to look at that year at the lessons learned and how much I have matured in that year.
So I am welcoming the delta's in my life. Welcoming the changes that are bound to happen in my life. Sure, times will get tough at times, but I know that things are changing this year. I feel better knowing that it's 2009.